I keep losing motivation for my projects and finding motivation elsewhere. I started this website earlier this year in hopes of getting somewhere by now. I think the realization that it hasn't yet "clicked" for how to make it cute quickly and easily is what's keeping me down. My brother's best friend gave me some people I should watch in order for it to make sense, so that was nice of him. Yet I have made no progress, in attempting or learning. I'm writing this in hopes that it will return me back into this trial-and-error passion project. This is the first time I've even touched my laptop in a while, which for me is kind of crazy. I'm usually addicted to my laptop rather than my phone but lately their roles have reversed. It makes me physically ill. I do not like being dependent or addicted to my phone, yet I always fall back in the loop eventually.
If you actually went and checked out my instagram, you might've seen my zibaldone that i posted. Instead of anything I need to do or working on my personal goals, I began decorating the cover last night. I knew I was going to do it eventually to scrapbook-ify it, but I want to work on this website atm. The motivation isn't there so my body procrastinates in other creative ways. Another personal goal I've had is my participation in a reading challenge for the year. But I'm about 50 pages into my 400 page book that I wanted to finish by the end of February, so...maybe I'll get it done by the end of March. I haven't picked up the book since probably the 10th. Yeesh.
I found my journal. But I haven't written in it, which sucks because I think I'm depressed right now. So I started taking my meds again. I took them twice... like four days ago. Luckily I have it right beside me as I'm about to head to bed and can take it right now. Annnnnnnd done. Alas, there might be hope for me yet. I just need to find it in the deep recesses of my soul.